Reason # 257 – I Routinely Fail As A Father Before 9am During A Typical School Week

Let’s face it. Mornings on a school day are stressful. Especially Mondays. And Tuesdays. Well, if I’m being honest, every morning, really. 

  1. Monday Morning: I’ve forgotten that my wife now has early shifts in the morning, which means it’s up to me to get our son ready and out the door for school at 9am.  I don’t realize this until 8:35.  I wake him up late. “Why did you wake me up so late, Dad?  Now I’m going to be late for school!”
  2. Tuesday Morning: I remembered Jenny now works early, so I wake up and got Logan up too. It was earlier than he was used to. He promised me that he would get up, so I go downstairs grab some coffee and get ready myself.  He immediately falls back asleep. I don’t realize this until 8:35. I wake him up late. “Why did you wake me up so late, Dad? Now I’m going to be late for school!”
  3. Wednesday Morning: Learned my lesson from yesterday. I grab some coffee and get myself ready. Then I go and wake him up.  I tryto wake him up with enough time for him to get ready without being rushed.  Then he realized that he has homework due. “Why didn’t you wake me up earlier, Dad? Now I don’t have time to get my homework done!” He rushes to get his homework done and gives it to me to check the answers. I receive a call from work and forget to give the homework back before sending him off to school. 
  4. Wednesday Evening: I just had to face it, waking him up in the morning is the equivalent of a rocket sled to Hell. So, I did myself a favor and got him an alarm clock.  I consider how to blog about the sheer simplicity and brilliance of the alarm clock.  Ellen or Dr. Phil will realize I’m the first person in history to win at fatherhood and invite me on their TV shows. What am I going to wear?
  5. Thursday Morning: I’ve seriously underestimated my son’s ability to utilize the snooze button.  “Why didn’t you wake me up, Dad?  Now I’m going to be late for school!”  Sorry to disappoint you, Ellen, but I’m not winning fatherhood.  I have nothing to wear to your show, anyway.  
  6. Friday Morning: Tired. Irritated. Don’t want to deal with his morning shenanigans anymore. I go into the kitchen for some coffee and he’s already awake, dressed, and ready for school. “Today is Dads and Donuts day! Did you forget?  Let’s go Dad, it starts at 8! Get dressed already!  It’s 6:35, why didn’t you wake up earlier, I don’t want to be late for school!”  He’s happy to bring me to school, so maybe I’m not as far behind in fatherhood as I thought. Or he really likes the donuts.  Come to think of it, I don’t remember ever giving him back the homework from Wednesday, either. 
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